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Dec. 7th, 2020 08:43 pmAs if 2020 hadn't been rough enough, Friday we had to take Mikey in for his last vet visit. He was having trouble eating, he was throwing up whole food hours after it should have started digesting, he'd lost probably almost three pounds. We'd made an appointment for the oncologist to see him, but that wasn't going to be to the end of the month and it seemed cruel to make him wait till then in the increasingly faint hope that someone would be able to do something.
And this one hurts. More than Michelle-kitty did in a way because he was such an interactive personality. He curled up on the bed with us, he walked all over us and yelled and nibbled and licked when we didn't get up to feed him early enough. And then in the evenings when we were in the kitchen he'd walk in and yell for more food. He sat by whoever was in the armchair and tried to beg for human food. He was 16 pounds of loud, naggy kitty and the house is so much quieter without him.
That was Friday night. It hurt. We took him in and said goodbye, and stopped by to pick up subs for dinner on the way home, sat and ate them and went to bed hours before either of us normally did because fuck everything. Saturday we spent alternately hiding under the covers and getting up between episodes of Psych to do household chores. Sunday I spent... I don't remember much of what I did Sunday. A lot of doodling. Some watching Burn Notice. Trying to get my shit pasted together so I could at least pretend to be functional. It sort of worked. I polished my boots, I washed my makeup brushes, I did my skin care so my stress zits would go the fuck away. I didn't fold my laundry but, you know, whatever.
I had a televisit with my doc today, mainly to discuss the vaccine and whether I needed PT for my knee, which has finally reached "okay I guess I'll do something about this" levels of inconvenience. He confirmed that I needed to strengthen the quads for the knee and gave me a couple of exercises to do at home that, thankfully, do not require me to lean on my knee to strengthen it like most of the resistance band exercises I found online do. And he said that as far as he'd seen and heard (and I assume, being a doctor and all, especially one who has been politically active in an advocacy sense) the vaccine is as safe as it's going to get, he's going to get it when it comes around for him and he recommends I do too, and not to worry about the boy. So that was kind of a relief.
But then all I really had the energy to do was to watch a few hours of coding video walkthroughs and take another run at a lab which, yes, I got a few more tests passing on that but then I ran into issues. And I tried a few more things and none of those worked so, whatever, asking for help in the morning after I'm rested and less stressed.
Oh, and there's the health care thing. Did I mention that? It looks like I did,I would have sworn that happened on Thursday but I guess it was Wednesday. I don't know where Thursday went. Time is a lie, I somehow thought the 3rd was Wednesday. So, yeah, still getting married, there was a couple hours there this morning where the boy was grumbling about HR all being out because of covid in their department and it could take me two months to get health care, and then he made some phone calls and discovered that once we file the paperwork it will take about a day. So that's fine. I guess I need to call the magistrate's office tomorrow and see if we need to bring witnesses. I have no idea if my local aunt and uncle know the boy and I are getting married for the insurance, so that's going to be a hilarious conversation if we do.
I'm tired, y'all. I am goddamn exhausted and things keep happening to make me even more exhausted and I just wish stuff would stop happening for a while so I could sleep and catch up on my coding and my reading and my writing. And anything. Ever. At all. I want my cat back. I want things to go slower. I want... to feel better and more energized, I guess. I want to go back to last Monday when I had a victory under my belt and a large yelling squirmy furry boi nagging me for breakfast.
And this one hurts. More than Michelle-kitty did in a way because he was such an interactive personality. He curled up on the bed with us, he walked all over us and yelled and nibbled and licked when we didn't get up to feed him early enough. And then in the evenings when we were in the kitchen he'd walk in and yell for more food. He sat by whoever was in the armchair and tried to beg for human food. He was 16 pounds of loud, naggy kitty and the house is so much quieter without him.
That was Friday night. It hurt. We took him in and said goodbye, and stopped by to pick up subs for dinner on the way home, sat and ate them and went to bed hours before either of us normally did because fuck everything. Saturday we spent alternately hiding under the covers and getting up between episodes of Psych to do household chores. Sunday I spent... I don't remember much of what I did Sunday. A lot of doodling. Some watching Burn Notice. Trying to get my shit pasted together so I could at least pretend to be functional. It sort of worked. I polished my boots, I washed my makeup brushes, I did my skin care so my stress zits would go the fuck away. I didn't fold my laundry but, you know, whatever.
I had a televisit with my doc today, mainly to discuss the vaccine and whether I needed PT for my knee, which has finally reached "okay I guess I'll do something about this" levels of inconvenience. He confirmed that I needed to strengthen the quads for the knee and gave me a couple of exercises to do at home that, thankfully, do not require me to lean on my knee to strengthen it like most of the resistance band exercises I found online do. And he said that as far as he'd seen and heard (and I assume, being a doctor and all, especially one who has been politically active in an advocacy sense) the vaccine is as safe as it's going to get, he's going to get it when it comes around for him and he recommends I do too, and not to worry about the boy. So that was kind of a relief.
But then all I really had the energy to do was to watch a few hours of coding video walkthroughs and take another run at a lab which, yes, I got a few more tests passing on that but then I ran into issues. And I tried a few more things and none of those worked so, whatever, asking for help in the morning after I'm rested and less stressed.
Oh, and there's the health care thing. Did I mention that? It looks like I did,
I'm tired, y'all. I am goddamn exhausted and things keep happening to make me even more exhausted and I just wish stuff would stop happening for a while so I could sleep and catch up on my coding and my reading and my writing. And anything. Ever. At all. I want my cat back. I want things to go slower. I want... to feel better and more energized, I guess. I want to go back to last Monday when I had a victory under my belt and a large yelling squirmy furry boi nagging me for breakfast.
