(no subject)
Nov. 18th, 2008 06:43 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
kittydesadeOkay. I officially never want to have a nightmare like that EVER AGAIN.
Somehow, I was pregnant. I don't think I either knew this at the time or I was trying very hard not to think about it. But me, a couple friends from school, my best friend in childhood, and Katie Holmes (!?!) were going out for a night to see either KMFDM or Pig or both. And before we did this we went to dinner at someone's house. The slightly creepy thing was that the house was laid out and set in a place almost identical to the farm. Furniture and everything was different though.
So, we get there, and we're all sitting down to dinner, and I'm pretending that I'm married to the boy which, really, isn't anything new. People by now assume we're married, we've been together long enough. Or at least, some people do. But it's to keep me from being yelled at because the master of the house is very conservative and I'm pregnant out of wedlock, technically. Katie Holmes is also pregnant, but give that the last time I paid any attention to her in the news she was giving birth, this is unsurprising.
The nightmare part comes when, about halfway through dinner, I start bleeding. Yeah, that kind of bleeding. And since for some reason from the start of the dream I've gone from being vaguely aware I'm pregnant to about six, seven months, pretty well showing pregnant, this is worrisome to everyone. I get rushed off to a bathroom, told to sit down lie down something like that... things happen. People fuss over me. When it finally gets time to taking down my pants and my underwear, the most gruesome thing ever... the baby's head is falling down, apparently only held up by my underwear. She's really most sincerely dead. So I deliver a stillborn premature baby amidst much hysterics and freaking out and blood. The baby's fucking arm comes off somehow in the process and is still inside me. We have to go in with a kitchen tongs.
And then, mercifully, the cat woke me up. Thank you Mikey.
So, LJ is moving. I'm archiving all my shit just in case they lose some of it; no slight against them, but I do know that sometimes when people move equipment, some things get lost. So, archiving. All the journals I can think of. Maybe eventually before work I'll just do that find all journals thing and finish up.
Yesterday was the day of cutting myself. I have no idea why I was being so clumsy but for some unknown reason I managed to cut myself on paper, plastic, cardboard, the fucking tape dispenser, but not the boxcutter I was so carelessly wielding as to have a few relatively near misses. Apparently I'm clumsy only when it doesn't count. This didn't help because I still have a fair chunk of backlog from the mail order sale. Really, when LJ goes down to move, I'm not sure I'm going to notice. I'll be too busy packing boxes.
Um. What else. Not too much else, I guess. I am sort of semi officially going to Thanksgiving with the pagan fam instead of the ... other fam... I have a lot of family in the area. Both because I haven't seen as much of them as I want and in completely mercenary furtherance of a goal. Yes, deliberately cryptic again. Other than that... I don't know. Not much goes on. The mail order sale seems to have been a good one. The economy's in the crapper, go us. The boy's hours are getting cut at work but not substantially, and he's been reassured that this happens every year. Given the state of everything that's going on I'm weighing that against the fact that a lot of funny things happen to hours over the holidays, depending on what business you're in, and being thankful that my credit card debt is almost gone. Heh. And I need to take that seed money I've been given and start a mutual fund/IRA/investments of some kind. Sometime this week. But right now, I need to recover from that damn nightmare.
Somehow, I was pregnant. I don't think I either knew this at the time or I was trying very hard not to think about it. But me, a couple friends from school, my best friend in childhood, and Katie Holmes (!?!) were going out for a night to see either KMFDM or Pig or both. And before we did this we went to dinner at someone's house. The slightly creepy thing was that the house was laid out and set in a place almost identical to the farm. Furniture and everything was different though.
So, we get there, and we're all sitting down to dinner, and I'm pretending that I'm married to the boy which, really, isn't anything new. People by now assume we're married, we've been together long enough. Or at least, some people do. But it's to keep me from being yelled at because the master of the house is very conservative and I'm pregnant out of wedlock, technically. Katie Holmes is also pregnant, but give that the last time I paid any attention to her in the news she was giving birth, this is unsurprising.
The nightmare part comes when, about halfway through dinner, I start bleeding. Yeah, that kind of bleeding. And since for some reason from the start of the dream I've gone from being vaguely aware I'm pregnant to about six, seven months, pretty well showing pregnant, this is worrisome to everyone. I get rushed off to a bathroom, told to sit down lie down something like that... things happen. People fuss over me. When it finally gets time to taking down my pants and my underwear, the most gruesome thing ever... the baby's head is falling down, apparently only held up by my underwear. She's really most sincerely dead. So I deliver a stillborn premature baby amidst much hysterics and freaking out and blood. The baby's fucking arm comes off somehow in the process and is still inside me. We have to go in with a kitchen tongs.
And then, mercifully, the cat woke me up. Thank you Mikey.
So, LJ is moving. I'm archiving all my shit just in case they lose some of it; no slight against them, but I do know that sometimes when people move equipment, some things get lost. So, archiving. All the journals I can think of. Maybe eventually before work I'll just do that find all journals thing and finish up.
Yesterday was the day of cutting myself. I have no idea why I was being so clumsy but for some unknown reason I managed to cut myself on paper, plastic, cardboard, the fucking tape dispenser, but not the boxcutter I was so carelessly wielding as to have a few relatively near misses. Apparently I'm clumsy only when it doesn't count. This didn't help because I still have a fair chunk of backlog from the mail order sale. Really, when LJ goes down to move, I'm not sure I'm going to notice. I'll be too busy packing boxes.
Um. What else. Not too much else, I guess. I am sort of semi officially going to Thanksgiving with the pagan fam instead of the ... other fam... I have a lot of family in the area. Both because I haven't seen as much of them as I want and in completely mercenary furtherance of a goal. Yes, deliberately cryptic again. Other than that... I don't know. Not much goes on. The mail order sale seems to have been a good one. The economy's in the crapper, go us. The boy's hours are getting cut at work but not substantially, and he's been reassured that this happens every year. Given the state of everything that's going on I'm weighing that against the fact that a lot of funny things happen to hours over the holidays, depending on what business you're in, and being thankful that my credit card debt is almost gone. Heh. And I need to take that seed money I've been given and start a mutual fund/IRA/investments of some kind. Sometime this week. But right now, I need to recover from that damn nightmare.