(no subject)
Jan. 25th, 2019 11:50 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
kittydesadeWell, it wasn't quite the end of January when I had the epiphany, again, that I don't have to do my entire backlog of note taking, physics studying, etc etc etc, I just have to do today's portion, and then do tomorrow's portion tomorrow, and in time it'll get caught up. That there are no deadlines except the ones I impose myself. It'll be fine if I just pick it up today, with today's portion, and keep going. It's an epiphany I need to have more often, but my brain likes punishment. Specifically punishment I'm inflicting upon myself.
(If you needed to hear it, this is your reminder too: you don't have to do a backlog of all the habit you didn't do in order to get into that habit. Just do that habit for today.)
And this all came about because I was doing some research for a couple of books, which led into a music theory discussion whereby the braintwin led me like a child (because really, I have the learnings of a child in music theory) through some basics, whereupon I remembered that I meant to get back into the habit of doing guitar, which then led to "crap when am I going to practice scales tonight, I have to do the week's worth of physics and read and this and that and augh" And no. I did my basic writing for today. I have to do physics for today, and languages, but physics will only take about 20 minutes, and languages don't have to take that long. Then there will be time for 30 minutes of scales. And then there will be time for reading and relaxing.
Oyyyy. Big oy. But! But I did get things done this morning, despite last night being an entire shitshow of having vivid quasi-nightmares all night except for 4am when I was jumped by a yowling cat who wanted attention right now, mommy. And daddy. Cat-daddy was there too. He got the claws in the back and I got the claws in the face, not badly, but still not how or when I wanted to wake up. But I did get up at the usual time, put some clothes away, put chicken into a marinade for dinner tonight which the boy is now cooking, and got myself ready on time without rushing. (I didn't get exercise in but in my defense that's because I was still stiff. Something I should do tonight before I settle in on the couch.)
Phew. Also a thing that's been worrying me has since been assuaged, I was freaking out because I was falling asleep at my desk on Wednesday that my thyroid might be dropping again. But no, turns out it was just a combination of possibly a night of bad sleep (the aforementioned waking up coughing) and a really really stressful day. Last couple of days? No falling asleep in the middle of the day. So that's fine then.
I can do this. I can pick my routines back up, I can continue to be my awesome damn self. I can really, truly do this. I will start today.
(If you needed to hear it, this is your reminder too: you don't have to do a backlog of all the habit you didn't do in order to get into that habit. Just do that habit for today.)
And this all came about because I was doing some research for a couple of books, which led into a music theory discussion whereby the braintwin led me like a child (because really, I have the learnings of a child in music theory) through some basics, whereupon I remembered that I meant to get back into the habit of doing guitar, which then led to "crap when am I going to practice scales tonight, I have to do the week's worth of physics and read and this and that and augh" And no. I did my basic writing for today. I have to do physics for today, and languages, but physics will only take about 20 minutes, and languages don't have to take that long. Then there will be time for 30 minutes of scales. And then there will be time for reading and relaxing.
Oyyyy. Big oy. But! But I did get things done this morning, despite last night being an entire shitshow of having vivid quasi-nightmares all night except for 4am when I was jumped by a yowling cat who wanted attention right now, mommy. And daddy. Cat-daddy was there too. He got the claws in the back and I got the claws in the face, not badly, but still not how or when I wanted to wake up. But I did get up at the usual time, put some clothes away, put chicken into a marinade for dinner tonight which the boy is now cooking, and got myself ready on time without rushing. (I didn't get exercise in but in my defense that's because I was still stiff. Something I should do tonight before I settle in on the couch.)
Phew. Also a thing that's been worrying me has since been assuaged, I was freaking out because I was falling asleep at my desk on Wednesday that my thyroid might be dropping again. But no, turns out it was just a combination of possibly a night of bad sleep (the aforementioned waking up coughing) and a really really stressful day. Last couple of days? No falling asleep in the middle of the day. So that's fine then.
I can do this. I can pick my routines back up, I can continue to be my awesome damn self. I can really, truly do this. I will start today.
(no subject)
Date: 2019-01-26 02:28 am (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2019-01-26 03:00 am (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2019-01-30 12:43 am (UTC)\o/ And yeah, you totally got this! \o/