kittydesade: An open book with the top edge smouldering on fire (break my staff burn my book)
[personal profile] kittydesade
I'm looking over the Attorney General candidates, having called my Congresspersons this morning and told them DO YOU WANT A FUCKING LENINIST IN THE WHITE HOUSE only politer. So far I've heard Rudy Giuliani (ran New York City with a "goon squad", definitely a jackass, possibly has actual psychological problems of a diagnosis I don't know I'm not a doctor), Kris Kobach (currently working in the state of Kansas and a proponent of the dumbass wall, also has/pushes some of the most authoritarian, draconian immigration policies usually focused on punishing everyone else), and Jeff Sessions (denied a judgeship in the 80s for being a racist dick, haven't found anything current about him but the day is still young and I'm still at work. And then there's John Bolton, who might be the best of a bad lot.

And I'm writing scripts to deal with this that, I'm trying to stay away from THESE PEOPLE ARE HATEFUL ASSES WHO WANT ONLY WHITE MEN TO BE IN CHARGE even though I want to scream it from the heavens and have it be a valid reason to say no. But I'm trying. I was a little worried at how good I was getting at this until [personal profile] lireavue reminded me I come from a long line of skilled survivors and government workers and, you know, grew up in DC surrounded by politicians' children. I guess it's not that this is strange or unusual for me, it's that I rarely find it worth the effort to activate this part.

Mostly because I curate my internet experience for fun these days and I don't live around anyone I have to convince. Sigh. Maybe I should start re-cultivating that though. Bring those seeds out of the freezer.

Last root canal appointment today for the permanent filling yay! Dental insurance will probably reimburse me shit for that too, boo. ... I got nothing. It's over with YAY fuck off dental bills until my next cleaning.

I did manage to make minimums on Nano last night but little else. Hoping to do better tonight since I actually slept mostly through the night last night, even if I did get up at an absurd hour. And tomorrow is capoeira which, now that I've been off a week (again) I'm dragging my feet on going back to (again.) But I can't stay at home and sulk and cry for four years. In a practical sense, keeping up with a martial art will keep me fit and in shape and specifically capoeira teaches me to physically interact with someone in a way that encourages dodging and taking openings where you find them. And my mindset has never been difficult with transitioning from 'this is practice' to 'kick them through their ribs.' And in an emotional sense, fuck them I am not letting them lock me in my room to cry over the election results for four years fuck that.

And the rest... ergh. The rest is coming along? Bit by bit. I'm not entirely sure how to describe how I'm doing today. I definitely need to retool my daily routines to involve less energy, because they will. This is going to be hard. I'm putting a routine of two phone calls every third day or so to my congressmen (UGH) about one issue or another. If nothing else maybe I can Andy Dufrense them into hearing me. And then also there's the, we have no idea what's going to happen until January 20th when he actually takes power. And then all bets are off. So at this point that's stressing me out too, terrifying me.

I have to keep reminding myself there's no actual legal method for him to completely dissolve Congress and suspend the Constitution. At least as far as I know there isn't a way for him to suspend elections. Hell, they even had elections in the Civil War. He'd have to have the military, and as far as I know he has the military as the duly (ugh) elected President, but not their unwavering support. So.

I don't know. I'm deeply annoyed at having to spend at least the next four years tired and scared and angry. I can't even tell you. Even more annoyed that I have to do so and... fuck I don't know. I might at this rate go visit a synagogue because fuck you, you don't get to take my roots away from me or make me afraid to explore them.

I'm just low-key angry and high-key stressed, and on a national level everything fucking sucks.

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