(no subject)
Aug. 25th, 2016 12:11 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
kittydesadeDoing somewhat better today, I'm not 100% sure why but I think partly because I have named the brainweasels and shoving them in their pokeballs is a lot easier when you know what type they are and where they've spawned. Partly because I did sleep hard last night, apparently the only half of Voltron that did, and partly because of reminding myself that even if I don't have finished copies, I can have proof copies and most people are happy to buy proof copies. And if that doesn't work I have postcards. And those are fine too. (Besides, that way I'm not carting books from DragonCon. That was dumb.)
So, yes, calmer. I found a tutorial for formatting for CreateSpace, I started importing Sandborn. It'll be okay. Really.
And, in a timely coincidence, all the furor about the fucking Epipen ridiculousness has reminded me to check all my asthma medication at the local pharmacy, if they have the right prescription, etc. Apparently my prescription for Qvar was denied because I hadn't tried these older more generic ones because of reasons? I don't even know. Which is fine, my doc switched me to one of those, but I need to see if the scrip made it to the pharmacy first. At least the new one, Flovent, is on a cheaper tier. I am sticking with the Qvar through DragonCon though, I have enough for that thank god, and even if I'm reasonably sure I won't have side effects for Flovent since I didn't with Qvar (and don't with most drugs) the fucking last thing I want is a medical distress at DragonCon.
... I think that means I'm pretty much ready. Except for a shitpot of sewing but hey. But that's... more than I expected, somehow. Huh. And the shitpot of sewing should be easier with some degree of assurance that yes, I can sew this, it's fine. Leotards I might not know how to sew. Suit coats? I know how to sew. (Come to that maybe I should go back and resew that one dress with slightly more adroitness and less rush. Though I don't know what I'd use it for. It'd look good over that petticoat though.)
Blergh. I've done somehow more than I expected to do, most things feel finished, I have to fight not to crash now, before DragonCon, so I can get all the other things done like picking up my desk area oops. So people can work here while I'm away. And sewing. I do have all of the sewing. (But I also have all of the gorgeous tops and why can't I wear those and. Oops.) Still. Feeling considerably more optimistic about things today. Because of solutions, self, not because you're having a bipolar fit, stop that. You've had bipolar fits before, and you know that's not what this feels like. This is calm and in control and cheerful, not mania.
No, I really do feel somewhat better. Or at least, the anxiety brainweedles are gnawing on me less. I woke up at 6 in the morning (30 minutes before I was supposed to get up but not dire) with serious financial panic, and then I got the boy to pay the water bill (usually I do) and found out what the hotel will cost and got it transferred to my credit card and thought about things as they really are not as I was freaking out about and. I feel better. I can do this. I mean, it's not ideal, but I'm a grown-ass adult who can run up her credit card doing questionable things with 60k strangers if I choose. Nyah.
Allons-y!
So, yes, calmer. I found a tutorial for formatting for CreateSpace, I started importing Sandborn. It'll be okay. Really.
And, in a timely coincidence, all the furor about the fucking Epipen ridiculousness has reminded me to check all my asthma medication at the local pharmacy, if they have the right prescription, etc. Apparently my prescription for Qvar was denied because I hadn't tried these older more generic ones because of reasons? I don't even know. Which is fine, my doc switched me to one of those, but I need to see if the scrip made it to the pharmacy first. At least the new one, Flovent, is on a cheaper tier. I am sticking with the Qvar through DragonCon though, I have enough for that thank god, and even if I'm reasonably sure I won't have side effects for Flovent since I didn't with Qvar (and don't with most drugs) the fucking last thing I want is a medical distress at DragonCon.
... I think that means I'm pretty much ready. Except for a shitpot of sewing but hey. But that's... more than I expected, somehow. Huh. And the shitpot of sewing should be easier with some degree of assurance that yes, I can sew this, it's fine. Leotards I might not know how to sew. Suit coats? I know how to sew. (Come to that maybe I should go back and resew that one dress with slightly more adroitness and less rush. Though I don't know what I'd use it for. It'd look good over that petticoat though.)
Blergh. I've done somehow more than I expected to do, most things feel finished, I have to fight not to crash now, before DragonCon, so I can get all the other things done like picking up my desk area oops. So people can work here while I'm away. And sewing. I do have all of the sewing. (But I also have all of the gorgeous tops and why can't I wear those and. Oops.) Still. Feeling considerably more optimistic about things today. Because of solutions, self, not because you're having a bipolar fit, stop that. You've had bipolar fits before, and you know that's not what this feels like. This is calm and in control and cheerful, not mania.
No, I really do feel somewhat better. Or at least, the anxiety brainweedles are gnawing on me less. I woke up at 6 in the morning (30 minutes before I was supposed to get up but not dire) with serious financial panic, and then I got the boy to pay the water bill (usually I do) and found out what the hotel will cost and got it transferred to my credit card and thought about things as they really are not as I was freaking out about and. I feel better. I can do this. I mean, it's not ideal, but I'm a grown-ass adult who can run up her credit card doing questionable things with 60k strangers if I choose. Nyah.
Allons-y!
(no subject)
Date: 2016-08-25 06:39 pm (UTC)anxiety brainweedles
I ♥ this metaphor
(no subject)
Date: 2016-08-25 07:03 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2016-08-26 06:47 am (UTC)Sigh...I hate having to remind myself that I'm not losing my crap just because I feel *okay* for a change. Much sympathy.
>> Allons-y! <<
Have fun!
(no subject)
Date: 2016-08-26 12:48 pm (UTC)I hate that, too, it's as though on some level we think we don't deserve nice things, or there's no such thing as okay and not broken. Or whatever. Ugh. Brains. Silly things, really.
(no subject)
Date: 2016-08-26 07:16 pm (UTC)Yup. This. Though bodies and other people and the universe in general are silly too.