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Jan. 27th, 2016 10:19 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
kittydesadeOogh so sleepy. Possibly staying up last night doing fashion and makeup shit was not the best idea ever. I mean, on the plus side I discovered I had a handful of colors and one duplicate that I was never going to use because oh god on my skin? And on the minus side up too late on a capoeira night. And on the plus side I was good and only got the pixie epoxy and two samples having determined that I don't have nearly enough golds (only one) and they have a gold red that would be interesting with my hair and since my eyes do the thing.
(The thing my eyes do is normally they're brown? But with the right semi-common combination of blood flow? dilation? and light angles they go gold. Sometimes really bright gold. Hell, sometimes in the right angle of light they glow red without the need for any camera. Friend of mine when we were kids almost fell out of the fucking window because of that. It was awesome. And a 4 ft drop.)
I've hit that I have too many projects and too much shit to do stage again. I don't actually think I do? But my god it feels that way. And I'm exhausted just thinking about it and I don't want to do any of them. Least of all the scary ones.
This is probably the lack of sleep talking.
And. I'm looking at my list of things to do and there are too many of them and I just want to go back to bed. (The phone at work ringing every five minutes only to turn out to be either a hangup or a robot is not helping.) And I know how to do this, it's one thing at a time, I have all my tabs open with all the things I need to work on, and it should be quiet enough that I can. But I look at it all and I want to cry. I was so rested and okay yesterday. Meh.
... No, this really is the lack of sleep/poor sleep talking, I think. Because other than that I feel fine. I'm just very sleepy and resent the fact that I have to do things that are not sleep. And would even if I was at home. So. Up and get going.
I don't think I'll do a full Wednesday Reads post today, but for now I've started Jaran by Kate Elliott, I'm working on a history of the Underground Railroad by Eric Foner, and I might start The Quartered Sea or I might not. For some reason the whole Mayan Empire analog thing is giving me quibbles. I swear it didn't used to! But right now for some unknown reason it is. But I have The Quartered Sea coming up, and if not that I have a couple of Phrynes to read and I might just skip straight through to Enchantment Emporium books, and I have Atlanta Burns I want to read too. I will not lack for reading material for the moment. By which I mean I will not lack for decisions about reading material, because I never lack for reading material.
And one thing I did discover is that if I sit my ass down and pencil in something, apparently my self-esteem is no longer so tied to drawing that it'll freak me out, and it will in fact calm me down to sketch or shade something. Which is a nice change from in middle/high school when it did freak me out about how much worse I was than anyone else. But that might have been hormones and the age. Or just school. Or both.
(The thing my eyes do is normally they're brown? But with the right semi-common combination of blood flow? dilation? and light angles they go gold. Sometimes really bright gold. Hell, sometimes in the right angle of light they glow red without the need for any camera. Friend of mine when we were kids almost fell out of the fucking window because of that. It was awesome. And a 4 ft drop.)
I've hit that I have too many projects and too much shit to do stage again. I don't actually think I do? But my god it feels that way. And I'm exhausted just thinking about it and I don't want to do any of them. Least of all the scary ones.
This is probably the lack of sleep talking.
And. I'm looking at my list of things to do and there are too many of them and I just want to go back to bed. (The phone at work ringing every five minutes only to turn out to be either a hangup or a robot is not helping.) And I know how to do this, it's one thing at a time, I have all my tabs open with all the things I need to work on, and it should be quiet enough that I can. But I look at it all and I want to cry. I was so rested and okay yesterday. Meh.
... No, this really is the lack of sleep/poor sleep talking, I think. Because other than that I feel fine. I'm just very sleepy and resent the fact that I have to do things that are not sleep. And would even if I was at home. So. Up and get going.
I don't think I'll do a full Wednesday Reads post today, but for now I've started Jaran by Kate Elliott, I'm working on a history of the Underground Railroad by Eric Foner, and I might start The Quartered Sea or I might not. For some reason the whole Mayan Empire analog thing is giving me quibbles. I swear it didn't used to! But right now for some unknown reason it is. But I have The Quartered Sea coming up, and if not that I have a couple of Phrynes to read and I might just skip straight through to Enchantment Emporium books, and I have Atlanta Burns I want to read too. I will not lack for reading material for the moment. By which I mean I will not lack for decisions about reading material, because I never lack for reading material.
And one thing I did discover is that if I sit my ass down and pencil in something, apparently my self-esteem is no longer so tied to drawing that it'll freak me out, and it will in fact calm me down to sketch or shade something. Which is a nice change from in middle/high school when it did freak me out about how much worse I was than anyone else. But that might have been hormones and the age. Or just school. Or both.