(no subject)

OKAY well after a lot of panic, I managed to not only get my code debugged (turns out a bug HAD snuck in there when I refactored it) most of the way (there's still one more bug that I need to hunt down, or get another pair of eyes in there to hunt down, but I don't think it'll affect my assessment much), I managed to work through my extra code that I'd decided to do because I was feeling Extra. And get that debugged. And get the data scrape method coded up and functioning. It's a lot more clunky and clumsy which is why I'm not presenting it as the primary product, but it all works. It goddamn works. It took ...

... hell, I don't know how long it's supposed to take a student but it probably took twelve hours total, from concept to this point. Because every time, once I actually sat down and started working on things, it went really, really quickly. I worked in two hour sessions, so six times sounds about right, it went quickly. There was a huge amount of panic, but overall it went well and quickly and I do, on the other side of this, feel like I know how to do it.

And now, heh, I'm frantically shoveling ravioli into my mouth in the 20 minutes I have before the assessment but whatever. I think after the assessment I'm just going to take a break until 3 and maybe, if I have to, tack another hour on in the evening since tomorrow's my break day. I have three more labs to do, I might be able to get to the Sinatra project Thursday, if I don't it's not the end of the world, the upshot is yes. I can do this. I am good at it for what I've learned, for my skill level. I will be good at it when I finish school. Now I just have to keep telling myself that every time I start panicking.

I did have an unpleasant surprise in that my pandemic assistance version whatever the fuck it is ran out starting Monday, so now I've applied for even further assistance. Which is balls. It's fine, I have enough money to cover bills for the next while, my family is supporting me, it just. It's stressful, and it's extremely aggravating because I should not fucking have to lean on or depend on family support because that is not a generally applicable resource! And the asshats in Congress are working on another bill that includes liability shields for corporations forcing people back to work and does not include assistance to everyone else and I just. Fuck you aaaaall.

And Mikey is still doing poorly. The boy had a message from the vet that said his bloodwork is clean, which is fine and all but he's still losing weight and vomiting so, um. If it's not in the bloodwork and it's not on the scan, what's up with this? I don't know what our next step is but it'll probably cost money which, see above. And I'm tired. And worried.

But I suppose as far as my future career working in web development goes I'm much less stressed about that, and I do have the high of successful programming to push me through the next few hours. My makeup look today is pretty bomb. Things are going pretty well other than, you know, money and the cat. I need to get back to messing around with some of the resources that I got on Humble Bundle. And by get back to I mean start, but I think that once I start it'll be pretty easy to work into a routine. Maybe that's what I'll do today after, um. Meeting, then bass practice and PT and relaxing, then I can log in to those sites and check what the resources are and how to navigate through them. That's enough for a class day. And that'll get me started on that.

I'm going to be okay. It's going to be okay. God willing and the covid don't strike, it really is going to be okay, except for the part that's not that no amount of anything will fix, but that'll be okay too, in time. Deep breaths. It's going to be okay.

ETA: It was fine, self. It went fine. You're fine.