(no subject)

( Gaeilge )

And yet MORE thinky thoughts on the OUAT episode, one being that's a really big house with a lot of stairs for someone with a bad knee. And two being, nice juxtaposition, I don't normally let people get away with Belle walking away from his little White Witch's castle. (Seriously, did he steal that from the White Witch? Because it looks a lot like hers.)

Valentine's Day Curry happened. Lamb mango. Strawberry Lassi. Chocolate drizzled all over cheesecake. And then passing out promptly after happened, I don't know why I was so tired yesterday. No, wait. Probably something to do with yesterday being relatively busy and the cat keeping me up a fair bit the night before. So. Um, something. It's been chaotic, it needs to stop being chaotic.

But I did find out some things about the house, namely that we should hear something back by Friday, they asked the listing agent to do a BPO, Broker Price Opinion. Which apparently means we confused them with our lowball offer, so they're trying to figure out if they should be asking $MinasTirith or $TheShire or what. I'm not even sure what that means, although I can point out all sorts of reasons why they should ask $TheShire. But then again, I'm biased. Slightly less biased on account of I value the house probably higher than someone looking to buy a house should, but.

This Clayne Crawford kick should see me through to the weekend at least. Joey. Hee! Yes, I am shallow.

(no subject)

( Deutsch )

Tired. So very tired. I think I keep underestimating the emotional toll this whole house thing is taking out of me. It's not unreasonable to carry some stress over where you're going to live in a couple of months. Are the odds good that we'll get the house and not pay over what we can afford for it? Yes. Does that mean this is in any way shape or form settled? No. Thus, uncertainty. Thus, stress. Come on, Jag, you know this. Account for it, install coping mechanisms, do not beat yourself up for needing coping mechanisms or ignore the need for them.

Really, I want to just curl up with Once Upon A Time and write stupid Gold self-insert fanfic forever for the next week. So far I have, self-insert character breaks into his house, curls up in his chair, drinks his juice/booze, and tells him he's an idiot and a jackass. Because he is. Admittedly, mostly the latter than the former, but still. I have... Okay, I don't have so much self-insert fanfic. I have The Courtship of Rumplestiltskin and his Lady to finish and I have probably another Ruby/Gold to write. I also want to do that self-insert pointless fic set to Florence + the Machine's Howl with someone/Gold but I haven't figured out how to do that one yet. I also want to write fic involving smacking Rumplestiltskin upside the head every time he giggles like that. Or, no, every time he fakes that stupid high-pitched cackling mad persona. I think that was one of the things I liked most about Skin Deep; it gave us a glimpse of Rumplestiltskin speaking openly, honestly, and normally, instead of pretending to be more erratic and deranged than he really is.

... Which actually makes me wonder just how over the top he went after we left him in Desperate Souls, and how long it took him to regain some semblance of normality. Obviously some parts of him broke forever, he goes around exploding fairies and turning people into objects without blinking even when he's not the tittering idiot, but the gleeful rage we saw when he slaughtered the soldiers doesn't seem to be there. And it all reads like he went, well, mad with power for a bit and then dragged himself back to some form of stability. And, see, that's a story I'd be interested in seeing. As opposed to Regina, who only seems to be doing things for the Evulz.

Actually, that's another thing. Rumplestiltskin has issues which have subscriptions to entire catalogs of back-issues, but to me, he doesn't read as either psychopath or sociopath. Severely damaged person who went through a horrible war, spent years twitching with PTSD, then flipped into a whole other phase where all these feelings burst out into murderous violence. Which made him a very dangerous person to be around and, in all likelihood though we never see it, a highly unfit father. Which is kind of sad, but there you go. And then years pass and somewhere in between then and 'now' in fairy tale land he became someone so detached from humanity in general that individual lives have little meaning for him, and so dangerous in a whole other way. But at neither point was he inherently psycho- or socio-pathic. It's all learned behavior/reactionary, whereas we've seen nothing from the Evil Queen in either incarnation to indicate she ever had any ability to relate to other human beings on any kind of emotional level, ever. Two different types of monsters. One, heh, significantly more interesting than the other. I mean, there probably can be interesting sociopaths, just look at half the crime dramas, but god, EQ is so damn dumb sometimes.

I also feel like I should double check my definitions to make sure I'm using the correct term for murderous-volatile-Rumple. Ah well.

Right. I want to go home and curl up with all the Clayne Crawford episodes of everything ever. What will probably happen is I'll go home, do my guitar practice, do my Japanese, and then curl up with writing and try not to create several characters with my latest lust object's face while I'm doing my writing. Such is this crazy life of mine. And I have to make sure the goddamn fridge and freezer are actually working, I forgot, fucking hell. God I want to be in this new house and fuck the rest of this stress crap.

(no subject)

( 日本語 )

Yeah, no, our fridge is well and truly dead. Looks like it's takeout and canned meals for the next couple of nights until we can get a new one from apartment management. Whoop de fucking do. Can I have my new house yet? So I can put my new goddamn fridge in it? Pizza for dinner tonight.

I should say something deep and profound and meaningful here. Or maybe something else analytical about Once Upon A Time (and, mainly, Rumplestiltskin) and I kind of feel like I should say that as much as I wanted to shake Belle for being an idiot I realize that I'm also cranky because I expect her to know things that I know, and take that knowledge for granted. With the knowledge and experience she had to work with, she actually did a damn fine job. So, there, I said it. Also, she is the first main female character in any goddamn episode of Once Upon A Time I haven't loathed for being a dippy twit. Well, no, there was Gretel. Second main female character of an episode. There, I said it.

But mostly I'm just tired. I'm tired of this house shit, I'm tired of this apartment being too damn small and/or things not working (heater at the beginning of winter, fridge now, the carpet cleaning they promised never showed up), I'm tired of idiots making dinner plans and then canceling with us at the last minute because they stayed up all goddamn night like morons, I'm tired of the Republican fucking morons who seem to be dominating their party's front lines. And the news in general. I'm tired of the boy's work drama (long story I probably shouldn't share) and I'm tired of being tired and never catching up on my goddamn work.

Fuck the world, I'm going to bed. (And by going to bed I mean writing and going to bed on time rather than early for once. Which is sort of like going to bed but less fun.)