![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
SOMEONE is singing that stupid "People in your neighborhood" song from Mr. Rogers and it won't go away.
*ahem*![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-userinfo.gif)
notoucheehat*ahem*
*ahem*
notoucheehat*ahem*Jan. 11th, 2004
I am going to kill you. Just see if I don't.
Okay, I was actually productive today, despite the night from hell. I illustrate:
4:45 pm, boyfriend goes out to game
2:35 am, boyfriend has not yet returned
2:37 am, call friend's house where boyfriend went to game and ask if he is dead in a ditch somewhere between here and there... the answer is apparently no, he was just leaving after copious amounts of drama
3:04 am, boyfriend arrives home without dinner he said he was going to bring... it would probably be cold anyway
3:47 am, go to sleep after news of the drama and minestrone soup
4:55 am, get woken up by boyfriend to hear message of really weird phonecall of DOOM! on answering machine
5:23 am, finally get back to sleep after freaking out and wondering if that was some cryptic message of impending death or car bombs in my poor beat up old ford'
5:36 am, wake up again to sound of dog vomiting beside bed
7:35 am, get woken up again by boyfriend coming back to bed after telling parents about really weird phonecall of DOOM!
8:09 am, wake up yet again and go into computer room to either write or crash on spare bed
9:05 am, finally get back to sleep
1:02 pm, wake up again.
So, yeah. Not a night in which to prepare for being productive the next day. At least I actually didn't have nightmares. Applying tooldestbeloved for protection against said nightmares has been useful over the past couple of nights. Thank you, my love.
But now I have a different bugbear to contend with. Namely my own deadly sin, the evil bogeyman that has plagued me ever since... well, ever. Envy and self-doubt, the malicious little bastard twins that sit on my shoulders and whisper in my ears.yuki_onna is getting published, and I'm glad for her. But at the same time there's that little voice inside, that tiny sneering voice going why haven't you done the same? why did you squander all those years after that first acceptance letter? And another little voice, timid and afraid, says you'll never get there. you'll never be as good as she is, just give it up now while you still have your pride
The hell. I hate these voices sometimes. I much prefer the ones in my head that come from my stories, my old friends who tell me about their infinite lives and give me materiel to set down to paper. The people, as one of them is so annoyingly singing, in my neighborhood.
(I'm still going to kill you.)
EDIT: You know, upon reflection, I blame lack of sleep for my horrible mood. And I addedfriend_whoring. Why? Because I can. And because it's dreadfully funny. Go, follow the crowd, you know you want to.
Okay, I was actually productive today, despite the night from hell. I illustrate:
4:45 pm, boyfriend goes out to game
2:35 am, boyfriend has not yet returned
2:37 am, call friend's house where boyfriend went to game and ask if he is dead in a ditch somewhere between here and there... the answer is apparently no, he was just leaving after copious amounts of drama
3:04 am, boyfriend arrives home without dinner he said he was going to bring... it would probably be cold anyway
3:47 am, go to sleep after news of the drama and minestrone soup
4:55 am, get woken up by boyfriend to hear message of really weird phonecall of DOOM! on answering machine
5:23 am, finally get back to sleep after freaking out and wondering if that was some cryptic message of impending death or car bombs in my poor beat up old ford'
5:36 am, wake up again to sound of dog vomiting beside bed
7:35 am, get woken up again by boyfriend coming back to bed after telling parents about really weird phonecall of DOOM!
8:09 am, wake up yet again and go into computer room to either write or crash on spare bed
9:05 am, finally get back to sleep
1:02 pm, wake up again.
So, yeah. Not a night in which to prepare for being productive the next day. At least I actually didn't have nightmares. Applying to
oldestbeloved for protection against said nightmares has been useful over the past couple of nights. Thank you, my love.But now I have a different bugbear to contend with. Namely my own deadly sin, the evil bogeyman that has plagued me ever since... well, ever. Envy and self-doubt, the malicious little bastard twins that sit on my shoulders and whisper in my ears.
yuki_onna is getting published, and I'm glad for her. But at the same time there's that little voice inside, that tiny sneering voice going why haven't you done the same? why did you squander all those years after that first acceptance letter? And another little voice, timid and afraid, says you'll never get there. you'll never be as good as she is, just give it up now while you still have your prideThe hell. I hate these voices sometimes. I much prefer the ones in my head that come from my stories, my old friends who tell me about their infinite lives and give me materiel to set down to paper. The people, as one of them is so annoyingly singing, in my neighborhood.
(I'm still going to kill you.)
EDIT: You know, upon reflection, I blame lack of sleep for my horrible mood. And I added
friend_whoring. Why? Because I can. And because it's dreadfully funny. Go, follow the crowd, you know you want to.