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Dec. 28th, 2020 01:38 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
kittydesadeCouple hours of code went... reasonably well? Whenever I last posted that, so this week in the weird liminal space between Christmas and New Year's I'm going to try something different to get back into regular study habits: I'm just going to do my afternoon and evening class blocks, and let the morning be for relaxing, reading, hiding under blankets from the cold, that kind of thing. Hopefully this will work out and by next week I'll be more like myself before December, when everything seemed to fall apart.
(I have ten tests left to do on this lab and then coding a project and it's not that hard and oh my god I don't want to do any of it.)
Still having severe stress shopping urges and oh my god, I do not know why I want to buy five more pairs of false lashes but that is really excessive, especially since you can reuse them 10-20 times each and I already have, um. An embarrassing amount. Clothes. I can't think of any clothes I particularly need, I have adequate sweats and underwear and socks and things, I made sure of that before winter hit because if it gets below about 30 we can't do laundry, our pipes from the utility room aren't heated and the water just freezes and causes clogs and problems. If we lived in a place where we regularly had months with it not going above 30 that'd be a problem, but I live in the South even if it is the mountains so we usually just do laundry in the middle of the day when it's in the 40s, and if we have a couple days of below freezing temps that's fine. Um. What else do I want to buy, more Frye things because I keep getting their sale emails. I do not need more boots even if I like stompy boots. More jewelry. I have lots, come on. Makeup and skin care have calmed down, I don't have urges for art supplies, but it's only a matter of time before it cycles around there, too.
... no, on second thought let's not get into an argument about why (linguistic) anthropology should be used as an excuse to erase all context, cultural or historical or otherwise, from a word or a concept and render it neutral because language evolves and... something. I'm not sure what argument this person's trying to make but it looks like an awful one and I have code to untangle.
(The code is also frustrating, but less frustrating than dealing with humans.)
I dunno. Although it is nice to feel more capable of doing things even if I'm starting it up slowly. Picked up the office a bit, wrangling the code, I did some writing prep yesterday, I feel a bit more like my brain is organized and energized enough to deal with writing. I feel more normal? Of course now that I say that something's going to knock me on my ass, but I feel better. Stronger. (Harder. Faster.) (I should get some Daft Punk for my coding music playlist.) Plus, soon the holidays will be over and I can hopefully resume a normal schedule and I feel like half these journal entries are complaining about things knocking me for six or complaining as I crawl back to normal.
I made the cupcakes for the boy's work, he took half of them to work and I got to eat the other half, and they were so good. Even the ones that had been in the fridge for a few days were still soft and smooshy, I love this recipe and I love that I'm slowly learning piping skills. I shouldn't make cupcakes as often as I want to given that I have zero willpower about cramming them in my face, but damned if I'm not making gorgeous cupcakes regardless of how often I practice. Plus, when things are back to normal in however many months, I can always send them to games with the boy as well as to work and that'll get a bunch of them out of the house.
Slowly picking up the house again, some more, still, after a few weeks of both of us being knocked on our ass, by grief, by unpredictable holiday schedules (boy), by vaccine side effects (also boy), by holiday stuff, by ... I don't even know what. Boy I can't wait till I get an IT job and can find out if we can afford someone to come in once every couple weeks and mop the floors, dust, wipe the surfaces, all that stuff that always gets pushed to one side in favor of dishes and picking up the clutter we accumulate. I probably could get in a routine to do it if my job is a 32-ish hour/week job, but other than that, ugh, paying someone for that stuff if we have the money. I will happy exchange cash for services that make my life easier. Plus, by the time I find out if I can make that much money, the vaccine should be more distributed so it'll be safer for someone to come in the house and do all that.
Also a landscaper. We really need a landscaper to come in and deal with the overgrown crap in the areas I want to walk in and make it easier for us to get around. I can live with the extended backyard being a wilderness, I don't mind the front yard being a bit of a wilderness, but the alianthus is a problem, there's at least two trees too close to the house, the mulberries need pruned (we do have a firm for the trees, thankfully), the white oak could probably use a trim, and at this point I really want someone else to put the damn berry plants in the ground for me. I just. Ugh. Too much crap going on. Not enough taking advantage of the time I had before tech school started. Also, I would like some stronger raised beds than the falling apart wood ones I have right now. Or an explanation of how to better maintain them.
Things to do when I have money. Which means I suppose I'd better get my ass back to coding. Or more accurately to dinner, then to the last bit of coding, then to the help line probably tomorrow. So it goes.
(I have ten tests left to do on this lab and then coding a project and it's not that hard and oh my god I don't want to do any of it.)
Still having severe stress shopping urges and oh my god, I do not know why I want to buy five more pairs of false lashes but that is really excessive, especially since you can reuse them 10-20 times each and I already have, um. An embarrassing amount. Clothes. I can't think of any clothes I particularly need, I have adequate sweats and underwear and socks and things, I made sure of that before winter hit because if it gets below about 30 we can't do laundry, our pipes from the utility room aren't heated and the water just freezes and causes clogs and problems. If we lived in a place where we regularly had months with it not going above 30 that'd be a problem, but I live in the South even if it is the mountains so we usually just do laundry in the middle of the day when it's in the 40s, and if we have a couple days of below freezing temps that's fine. Um. What else do I want to buy, more Frye things because I keep getting their sale emails. I do not need more boots even if I like stompy boots. More jewelry. I have lots, come on. Makeup and skin care have calmed down, I don't have urges for art supplies, but it's only a matter of time before it cycles around there, too.
... no, on second thought let's not get into an argument about why (linguistic) anthropology should be used as an excuse to erase all context, cultural or historical or otherwise, from a word or a concept and render it neutral because language evolves and... something. I'm not sure what argument this person's trying to make but it looks like an awful one and I have code to untangle.
(The code is also frustrating, but less frustrating than dealing with humans.)
I dunno. Although it is nice to feel more capable of doing things even if I'm starting it up slowly. Picked up the office a bit, wrangling the code, I did some writing prep yesterday, I feel a bit more like my brain is organized and energized enough to deal with writing. I feel more normal? Of course now that I say that something's going to knock me on my ass, but I feel better. Stronger. (Harder. Faster.) (I should get some Daft Punk for my coding music playlist.) Plus, soon the holidays will be over and I can hopefully resume a normal schedule and I feel like half these journal entries are complaining about things knocking me for six or complaining as I crawl back to normal.
I made the cupcakes for the boy's work, he took half of them to work and I got to eat the other half, and they were so good. Even the ones that had been in the fridge for a few days were still soft and smooshy, I love this recipe and I love that I'm slowly learning piping skills. I shouldn't make cupcakes as often as I want to given that I have zero willpower about cramming them in my face, but damned if I'm not making gorgeous cupcakes regardless of how often I practice. Plus, when things are back to normal in however many months, I can always send them to games with the boy as well as to work and that'll get a bunch of them out of the house.
Slowly picking up the house again, some more, still, after a few weeks of both of us being knocked on our ass, by grief, by unpredictable holiday schedules (boy), by vaccine side effects (also boy), by holiday stuff, by ... I don't even know what. Boy I can't wait till I get an IT job and can find out if we can afford someone to come in once every couple weeks and mop the floors, dust, wipe the surfaces, all that stuff that always gets pushed to one side in favor of dishes and picking up the clutter we accumulate. I probably could get in a routine to do it if my job is a 32-ish hour/week job, but other than that, ugh, paying someone for that stuff if we have the money. I will happy exchange cash for services that make my life easier. Plus, by the time I find out if I can make that much money, the vaccine should be more distributed so it'll be safer for someone to come in the house and do all that.
Also a landscaper. We really need a landscaper to come in and deal with the overgrown crap in the areas I want to walk in and make it easier for us to get around. I can live with the extended backyard being a wilderness, I don't mind the front yard being a bit of a wilderness, but the alianthus is a problem, there's at least two trees too close to the house, the mulberries need pruned (we do have a firm for the trees, thankfully), the white oak could probably use a trim, and at this point I really want someone else to put the damn berry plants in the ground for me. I just. Ugh. Too much crap going on. Not enough taking advantage of the time I had before tech school started. Also, I would like some stronger raised beds than the falling apart wood ones I have right now. Or an explanation of how to better maintain them.
Things to do when I have money. Which means I suppose I'd better get my ass back to coding. Or more accurately to dinner, then to the last bit of coding, then to the help line probably tomorrow. So it goes.