(no subject)

[kittydesade]

начать
Я не понять

понимать
Я не понимаю свой мозг.
Ты понимаешь что я думаю?
Никто не понимает что ты думаешь.
Мы не понимаем ничто.
Вы понимаете по-русски?
понимал, понимала, понимали

Argh I'm not getting time to finish this til after UPS goes so. Working on this in bits and pieces between.


EVERYBODY'S running late today. Yay. Wait, no, that other thing.

So, lyrics composing! I haven't done that in a while. I'm not terrified at all, particularly since this is kind of sort of maybe (okay, almost entirely) my fault and apparently the fate of the world rides on this. Pressurepressurepressurepressure /RDJ. Why no, I'm not panicking. Why would you think that. Shut up. Go 'way.

(Long story. Lots of pictures.)

Still need to check in and untangle the snarl that is my brain on semi-imminent book publishing. The "what is this how my life" moments have been coming thick and fast, and there's a huge amount of fiddly details that I need to do even apart from the line edits, which argh. Just in general, argh. My head's exploding as much from realizing all the little things I should be doing as from realizing that this could actually be a thing. And mostly, in short, writing and publishing? I'm actually doing it? The fuck? Five or six months worth of writing and putting it out there and having people read it, things which aren't fanfic, versus twenty years plus of writing original fiction and keeping it close or hidden, or only having a few people read it. And. It's a thing, okay?

Right, back to day job work, though. When I'm done with that stuff I can sit down and try to make sense of my scrambled egg brains. And at some point today I call Mom and freak out at her. And at some point tonight/tomorrow morning I crawl online and freak out some more at people oh who am I kidding. My online presence these days is one long slow-burning status of freakout.