kittydesade: (nameless is dubious)
I can't even begin to describe the amount of Nopetopus I have for the Yuletide pinch hit that just came across my inbox (before I happily deleted it because not doing Yuletide this year!) The request was for a film, adult character shipped with a 13 year old character, not aged up. Specifically requested not aged up.



The biggest problem with coming back to doing Russian from taking several days off is I no longer remember what the fuck I was reading. I got to the bottom of page 21 today, so tomorrow should be starting page 22, except I'm pretty sure I read all this already. Not that it hurts to re-read. Hopefully, though, I'll be able to get in a good two-three weeks more of Russian practice before my schedule gets derailed with holidays again.

Spent the morning cleaning out my email inbox instead of writing. Bad me. On the plus side I did get the shipping done with reasonable efficiency, and then got into writing. I think the goal is to try to finish White Lightning over the next week and keep doing 2k on Nerd Girls per day for the month. Which actually, I did get a chunk written this morning! So that's good. Um. Oh, and I was going to write a blog entry on failing Nanowrimo. Let's get to doing some of that then, so I can do curtains tonight. Insert curtains for you jokes here.

German has not yet been done, feel free to poke after 6pm EST if I have not updated this with my German done!

Adopt one today! Adopt one today! Adopt one today! Adopt one today! Adopt one today! Adopt one today! Adopt one today! Adopt one today! Adopt one today!
kittydesade: (beautiful day)
Маленькая девочка и коробку )

Yeah, apparently the Hyatt for Dragon*Con sold out in 18 minutes. So much for that idea and thank god we have a decent room in a decently close hotel already. With a sofabed for Kiki if she comes!

Today is much, much calmer at work, so I'm going to try to at least get some filing done and some writing. Which will be very nice. Nerd Girls first, and then maybe reading over some White Lightning if there's time.

My Abby cosplay was very impromptu and apparently very successful, as a couple people on the street even recognized it. This amuses me to no end, really. I put on my new arm warmers from SockDreams, with straps and studs, and then decided since I was going to do that and had purple and silver nails, might as well throw on some dark lipstick. And Born in Fire from Geek chic. And purple eyeli-- oh, wait, no, still haven't mastered eyeliner. Need to work on that. And hair in pigtails. And then I was coming down the stairs to head to work and my NCIS cap was right there on the banister railing and why the fuck not. And now I'm Abby. Causing no end of amusement from my co-workers aka my aunts, at least one of whom does watch NCIS and has taken to calling for Abby today.

FYI, Blasted by Sephora doesn't blast quite so well in silver as it does in black, but I think I also blame my own application of it some for that. The places where I applied it liberally look better, still not as blasted, but better. Definitely needs to be applied in thick, smooth coats, no smearing it once it's laid on or it won't shatter properly. So, tricky, but way fun and not hard to master. Still not sure when I became this whole makeup person.

Right. Back to work, I suppose, since i don't have anything else to blither about. Except I do need, maybe when I'm done with Halloween decs and arm warmers, to knit some leg warmers. Because it gets fucking cold in the mornings and I still want to dance, but I don't want my feet to freeze off.
kittydesade: (o captain my captain)
Маленькая девочка и коробка )

My head hurts, I have no idea where the aspirin is, and apparently contacting customers is almost entirely my job now. As if I didn't have enough shit to do already. I know phones are scary, co-worker, but you CAN use them and sometimes get an answer a lot fucking quicker than I am so why don't you make that your first fucking resort instead of passing it all to me. No? Fine, but don't be surprised if you ... something.

I am so seriously contemplating taking tomorrow off and getting a bunch of writing and house shit done just because fuck everything I had to work all last week with at least one person out at any given time I want a goddamn break. There are times when I seriously hate being the most ablebodied person in the store. This is one of them.

On the plus side, I did most of G&M today, hopefully the rest will come tonight. On the minus side, I didn't get any writing time today, which means tonight had damn well better be productive and not full of gasping and feeling weak and tired. I have shit I want to get done! And I actually want to get it done, too, rather than a bunch of writing and projects that I'm dragging my feet on because I don't actually like them anymore. Anna talked me out of my tree re: Nerd Girls and I think that's going to work out, and I want to get this shit done! I don't want to have it lingering over my head like a half-dead spider.

Ugh, I don't know at this point. I need to keep that list of projects I'm working on in the forefront of my mind and work on things as they come. Hopefully somewhere in all of this shit will get worked out. At least I've come up with some halloween dec ideas that I can actually do with the crap I have in my house.

I just need to find the time to do THAT, too.
kittydesade: (nameless is dubious)
Маленькая девочка и коробка )

Only about 50 words in Russian today.

So, in random and fascinating things I learned today about my family...

I grew up raised by my mother and her parents. You've probably heard me mention this a lot. There was a father (okay, stepfather, but we left my biodad when I was 3 so I never knew him and don't care to) for a while, till I was about 12-13, then he became much less present. But I was raised by my mother and her family, and remain close with them; when I say "my family" I pretty much mean my mom, grandparents on my mom's side, and all the myriad aunts and uncles therein.

My grandfather worked first for the State Department, then for the World Bank. Somewhere in there was a stint in the Merchant Marines, but I don't know much about that. (I should ask.) I don't know specifically what he did apart from advise people on how to put their country's economy back together, but to me, that's pretty much what he did. In Pakistan, Sri Lanka, Moscow, Kazakhstan, um. Various other countries, several former Soviet Republics. He went to a lot of places. And as a result of all this and the State Department, my mother and her sibs grew up in Spain and in Chile. And in Portugal for a year, which didn't come up until now because my mother wasn't yet a year old when they moved to a castle in Portugal (I'm not even kidding, though it wasn't a grand affair type thing, more like a big house.) and my aunt was seven or so. Old enough to remember things. After Portugal came Spain, then Chile. So...

So, these are the people who raised me. My mother didn't return to the States till she was maybe 14, 16? You wouldn't think that would make a difference, but it does, in odd ways. I keep finding ways in which my instinctive mindset doesn't reflect what seems to be the average American. Anyway, this whole ramble is also by way of explaining that my aunt told me in the car today, when Grandpa was being moved from Portugal to Spain for work, he and my grandma took a holiday between in Rome for a week or two, and she went ahead with the two littlest while Grandpa drove leisurely with the elder three, including the aunt I live/work with now. (Well, for a same-small-town value of live with.) And apparently they went across the Bridge d'Avignon. And if you've ever heard that child's rhyme, or maybe it's just me, Sur le Pont d'Avignon, l'on y danse, l'on y danse. Well, it turns out my grandfather actually stopped at the Bridge d'Avignon and made everyone get out and dance a little dance, because opportunities like that don't come every day. Or something. My grandfather, for all his sobersrs job and his sobersrs work clothes, can be a really whimsical and doofy guy sometimes.

This is my family, y'all. This probably explains a lot about me, assuming it required explanation.

(Come to think of it, I'm pretty sure my grandfather spent most of his career cosplaying as a sobersrs adult.)

Right. Gods and Monsters and day jobligations for the rest of the day, and then ... I don't even know what for the rest of the day. It's on my calendar. I'm not doing too badly, except for the fact that I'm frazzled and need rest and am not getting it. At least I'm getting good sleep at night, that's sort of helping keep me on my feet and on an even emotional keel.
kittydesade: (anton is my anti-drug)
Russian: Маленькая девочка и коробка )

Haven't done that for a couple of days both because it's been really busy at work (we're down two people and argh) and because I've hit that point again where every time I look at what I've done I'm convincing myself I suck at this and I'm never going to be any good at it and just go ahead and quit now before you try to speak Russian to someone and embarrass yourself. I hate this stage. It's basically level grinding. Also I hate this stage because I hate feeling bad about myself, but doesn't everyone?

One correction at a time. Seriously. There is no need to scream, throw your hands in the air, and give up on everything, self. No table flipping just because you didn't understand how to properly phrase a single fucking sentence.

(How I ever got through school without getting kicked out for either dropping classes when I got annoyed with them or for getting violent when frustrated I'll never know. Maybe it's just me in isolation.)

I did at least get the first draft of this week's Gods and Monsters done, which means tonight is edits and dime novels and tomorrow is all dime novels. If I get all my edits done. I've definitely hit the Gods and Monsters boggy middle part, which is sad because this should be the exciting end. And yet, not so much. The last uphill push of the boulder? Anyway, that'll be done soon, and then I can get back to freaking out about what happens when Black Ice goes live. Fun stuff!

... I think I need to rewatch Night Watch or something.

Adopt one today! Adopt one today!
kittydesade: (sherlock and kitten)
Маленькая девочка и коробка )

Oh, right. Noon is the hour of doing my Russian. Oops.

There. That's that done. This story's coming along much quicker than the other one, although I kind of started it to be a Pandora story and I think it's going to turn into something else. Oops.

I'm saying oops a lot today.

So, in the last couple of hours I have come up with a third dime novel to add to the two I'm attempting (and failing) to work on at the moment, finally come up with a Nerd Girls outline that... may be too dark for a young adult ish novel in that that's who I'm writing about and likely who my target audience is. (Look, it's Nerd Girls, not Nerd Women, yes?), debated going back to White Lightning and finishing or just starting it over again for Nano, leaning towards going back and finishing but argh, and started edits on the last and largest part of Black Ice. My brain is running a thousand miles a minute and it will not fucking stop. I'm pretty sure it will still be like this if I ever get to a point where I can write for a living, but goddamn. My head hurts and I feel dizzy. Where's the flow chart of projects or something.

I think what I'm going to do today is try and work on two dime novels and Black Ice edits during the day, and then Person of Interest blog in the evening, except when I'm watching Miss Fisher. With any luck I can make some progress on something that way without having my head explode from all the things I want to do and all the directions I want to travel in.

Mostly right now I just want to curl up with a bowl of soup and stare at pictures of Clark Gregg. Tomato soup. Definitely.

Adopt one today! Adopt one today! Adopt one today! Adopt one today! Adopt one today! Adopt one today!
kittydesade: (every night i burn)
Russian )

And then I need to do corrections on the other. Oh god, why am I doing two serials at once. In a way. Okay, we'll call it several serials, because the hell with the fairies for now I have no idea what's happening next. We'll start something else! I'll figure out where the fairies are going later. Too sleepy can barely brain in English.

I don't even with my old fucking town today. The most chaotic news I've heard out of there is that there were three shooters, one incapacitated in some way and two on the loose, and six dead, ten shot. I have no idea how accurate this is as of this writing, that's just the last I heard. I'm tired. I'm tired of these fucking morons insisting that everyone has a right to the kind of guns our founding fathers couldn't have dreamed of at the time, I'm tired of people putting their mental and physical comforts above the safety and well-being of others. I'm tired of this allegedly great nation being a paragon of such fucked-up-ness that we stand as a warning to every other goddamn civilized country of what not to do. I'm also tired of Breaking Bad, but that's a whole other thing.

At least my writing seems to be going well. Even half asleep I'm managing to pull together some words for a draft. I'm managing to get packing done. I did my Russian. I'm getting a surprising lot accomplished for having gotten absolute shit for sleep last night. Let's hope this continues till I can go to bed tonight. Otherwise I may have to punch something.

Adopt one today! Adopt one today! Adopt one today! Adopt one today! Adopt one today!
kittydesade: (facepalm - dean)
100 слова о торт в подвале. )

Because why not. Even though that's more like ninety six words. This is sort of working well, anyway. Although why everything has to be fairies I don't know. Also, note to self: review everything you can on participles.

Also I need new rude words to call Putin in Russian. Because reasons. And jackassery.

Gods and Monsters is done, Black Ice is being worked on, and I feel vaguely on time at the moment, even if I also feel like hammered shit. But I think I can actually knock out Brownie Mafia and Moose today, which would be very nice. I actually haven't even taken a look at the edits for two of the three remaining main stories. One of them I think was pretty much done the last time, but the other two... argh. I'll have a look at those tonight, I guess, and see how much work they need. And then Haven 1x12 and Haven 4x01 and hopefully Sunday Person of Interest whatever I'm up to, although I suppose I don't need to fully do that one either. Still. As much as I can. It's starting to look much more doable though now that I look at it more in terms of due dates! I can't even imagine what it's going to be like when we're doing Grimm, Haven, and Person of Interest, though. Argh. One thing at a time, self.

Apparently there's some liberal hatred on for Obama and love for Russia and all I have to say is ARE YOU FUCKING HIGH??? This is not a story about how Russia did the noble thing and was redeemed and everything because they brokered the deal we refused to and we wanted to go to war instead. Russia is not the fucking Draco in Leather Pants of the world. Russia is not Loki. Or maybe he is Loki because this seems to be a strong romanticize Russia streak and Russia will beat you and throw you in a gulag if you piss it off. And if you think this whole Syria issue is as simple as Obama wanted to wade in with bombs, Putin sat down and said something reasonable, and Syria caved? You need a serious history lesson in how politics works, friend. What we are seeing is, for once in highly apt metaphor form, the very tip of the iceberg. Many actions have happened that you have not seen. Jesus christ, this is not a game with points you can regain. The deal with Syria, assuming it works out as well as he hopes, does not negate all the shit Putin and the Russian government have heaped down on LGBT people in Russia. I am seriously expecting roundups and gulags next, the way things have been escalating recently. Not that it's ever been friendly, but.

*breath*

So, yeah. That happened, and annoyed me. At least it's not anyone I personally know, or even anyone I vaguely glance at on social media. I just. Really. Politics isn't that simple. Not even people are that simple.

Back to work, I suppose. Tonight I will have me some Phryne Fisher, some whiskey, and probably some good chocolate. I think I have decided in favor of getting some truffles for tonight to celebrate the return of Miss Fisher's Murder Mysteries. Seriously, you guys, if you enjoy a fun procedural and the twenties and Australian accents and a bob cut on a fierce woman, this is the show for you.

Adopt one today! Adopt one today! Adopt one today! Adopt one today! Adopt one today!
kittydesade: (randomity (nopejr))
100 слова о торте )

Yes, I did just write 100 words about cake in Russian. Predictably, it was evil cake. There would have been more description about why it was evil, but I only had 100 words.

This could actually be fun, you know. Writing 100 word or maybe eventually 150 word drabbles in Russian on topics yet to be chosen. I'd do it in German except I have just enough facil .... well. Maybe I SHOULD do it in German. Hmmm.

Still have a fair amount of crap to do, although not so much work crap, but then it all landed and Russian took longer than I thought it would and argh. Brain not working as fast nor processing input or output nor changing gears as fast as I want it to. This displeases me. I guess there's not much for it but to start tackling things one or at most two tasks at a time and see how it goes? But I'm still going to be grumpy that it's extremely likely I'm not going to get everything I wanted to do, done, today.

Stop that, self. You will get things done. As long as you get the essential things done, that's what's important. And it's true nothing will get done until you start doing, so start doing. Next!

Adopt one today! Adopt one today! Adopt one today! Adopt one today! Adopt one today!
kittydesade: (like a boss)
Russsssssian )

So, okay, that didn't quite work out as planned, on account of most of the afternoon was spent trying to do work and not throw up. But tonight there can be hand sewing and writing Gods and Monsters for next week. And in the meantime I can spend the rest of the afternoon editing stories to, help, put up for sale for 99 cents or so. Maybe 1.99, considering. .99 for 5000 words, 1.99 for 10,000. That seems about right, yes? Ulp. And then if things can get bundled together, periodically releasing anthologies of the short stories. I can't believe I'm even doing this. I need to revamp my fiction section, too, for various and sundry stuff. I think I'll start that, though, after I figure out how this whole Lulu thing works.

And in the meantime I'm going on fun other adventures, like Dragon*Con, and figuring out how to knit cables, and indigo dyeing. And after knitting cables there will be Fair Isle knitting, or at least stranded colorwork, and all kinds of other projects. So many projects do I have, you people! And I'm starting to, thinking of it all, have that feeling of what the hell why am I juggling all this shit how is this even possible. Bit by bit, self. Calm down.

And, you know, make a schedule. I think I need to do scheduling. I think I also need to do batch cooking again, only this weekend it needs to be batch cooking of the kind that can freeze easily, because we can just stick it in the deep freeze and have it there when I recover from Dragon*Con. Quesadillas and things, maybe. Spaghetti sauce. Actually, that sounds like an excellent plan. Note to self: Tell the boy to get more chicken for freezer meat for quesadillas. And. Okay, yes. I can do this. No sweat. Just one task after another.

(Am I starting to panic yet? No, but I am starting to come apart at the organization.)

And for all those of you who get by with a little help from your girlfriends, here's one woman's essay celebrating the ladies in her life. Warning: It does involve child illness/death/impending death, too, so keep that in mind.

Adopt one today! Adopt one today! Adopt one today! Adopt one today! Adopt one today! Adopt one today! Adopt one today! Adopt one today! Adopt one today!
kittydesade: (do what's impossible)
Russian, now with 100% fewer triggers! )

There's a few mistakes that I seem to constantly make on Russian. One of these days I will remember that 'room' is feminine. Really. Also given how much has changed I think I just need to write the vocab on a card and play mad libs.

I feel a severe need to run around in circles screaming. Dragon*Con, publishing things, Gods and Monsters, the blog, everything. Cleaning the goddamn house so I don't come back home to a pigsty. Eating properly and not keeping a steady diet of mac and cheese and sherbert for the next few days. Exercising so I stay awake and feel better about myself. Getting a decent night's sleep every night. Spinning the freaking yarn for everyone, and also to keep my zen. Augh. Twenty bajillion different things and all of them need to be done right the hell now and panic and freak out time yet?

No, not really. Everything's scheduled so that I have time to do everything, the only thing I might not have time to do before Dragon*Con is build the Tetsuo mutant arm, which has kind of fallen by the wayside since it was the least essential part of the whole thing. But I still have at least one weekend in which to sew or build an entire new costume, so it's really not that bad. Still not entirely sure what I want to do about my Silk Spectre costume. I have all the material for the rebuild I was going to do and now I just want to scrap it all and start over. Argh. Probably what I'll end up doing is sewing new sleeves onto the store-bought costume I have and calling that a good job for this year. If I really feel ambitious at the last minute I'll find some yellow gauzy material and make a robe over a black leotard. Who the hell knows. I have a shitton of potential costumes anyway. Oh, and I need to redo the collar on the Huntress cloak because I've decided I don't like how it is right now. C'est la vie.

Barring that, though, the writing stuff is going really well. Apart from my constant panic. Which I've learned to tune out by now, so there's that at least. I need to finish stripping edits on Black Ice, keep churning through Gods and Monsters, tweak and plan and outline other things. Life goes on? I need to do blog posts, too. Personal ones, that is. Murderboarding blog posts I've gotten into a kind of a rhythm on. Speaking of life going on, I should check in with the neighbors about that bed. Poor bastard.

Adopt one today! Adopt one today! Adopt one today! Adopt one today! Adopt one today! Adopt one today! Adopt one today!
kittydesade: (black ice)
Russian, now just directions )

Which is easier than pasting that giant gob of Russian which I now need to print out and practice at some point. maybe later today. It's not even that much to memorize compared to the plays and things I used to memorize, and in Russian (or German) I'm fluent enough that it makes sense to me, so my brain won't balk and go "IT'S JUST NOISES." Still argh.

So, I'm just speculating right now, but I could totally turn this Nerd Girls thing into a series. Okay, screw speculating, the way this thing is turning out it's likely it will become a series. How quickly and efficiently that happens is another thing entirely. But in the meantime I'm checking to see how much of a series I can make of it. Nerd Girls Save The World is the first one, but after that, then what?

I should actually stop thinking about Nerd Girls and start thinking about Black Ice, since now is the hour on Sprockets when I start pulling edits out of the docs. Eep. After that comes macro edits, if there are any (I think there are), and after that comes formatting, and after that comes print formatting. Though I might just say 'fuckit' and rel... well. If I strip all the edits out and realize that I don't actually have much more in the way of macro edits to do, that means I can just format everything and set it to release at or just after Dragon*Con. And isn't that a terrifying thought. Especially since then I need to get started on ramp-up publicity YESTERDAY. Or actually a month ago.

This is the moment when I tell myself to get the fuck off of Dreamwidth and get back to doing things because you're spending too much time talking about doing things and not enough time doing them, isn't it. Yes? Yes.

Adopt one today! Adopt one today! Adopt one today! Adopt one today! Adopt one today! Adopt one today! Adopt one today!
kittydesade: (morning ugh)
Russian )

No, still exhausted. And irrationally craving melon. In hindsight, though, after two days of trying to find a damn map, it occurs to me that they're moving a lot of things around and I really should just memorize non-English/Spanish directions in terms of left, right, across, because I will have to fucking reorient myself again. ARGH. The only saving grace to this is that all the stuff I always want to do every year has reoriented itself into the Marriott. So I just have to go downstairs for it! Yay! That's one aspect of getting lost eliminated.

Work's been too busy for me to really get any writing done apart from this entry here and there, which isn't too bad since I seem to be unable to push words through my brain. I went to bed early last night to deal with this problem, dammit. And it's not going away. Maybe I need more protein in my diet or something.

Scrivener's word processing functions are, maybe not so much entirely antithetical to my way of writing? But certainly tangent to perpendicular. Why would you ever complicate things needlessly like that? (Why? Because your brain doesn't organize things like my brain does.) And on the other hand oh dear god I think that compile and format suitable for digital publication thing might be the best thing I've seen since last Dragon Con. Nnngh.

Adopt one today! Adopt one today! Adopt one today! Adopt one today! Adopt one today! Adopt one today! Adopt one today! Adopt one today! Adopt one today! Adopt one today!
kittydesade: (under construction (nopejr))
Russian. This is getting long. (GETTING? you ask.) )

Prepositions will fucking kill me, I swear. So will navigating fucking Dragon*Con. I love the place but it is built around a goddamn maze of hotels with a few satellite hotels, and there is NO GODDAMN MAP. You need a ball of string.

(I kid, of course, but I haven't found the right map I need to get the sentences I might make translating directions into Russian, so I bitch.)

I'm tired already, not sure why. Everything is slowly but steadily making progress, and I don't feel like I want to put anything down just yet or whine because I can't, but I'm really tired. I'm starting to lose track of which thing I need to be working on at any given point if I leave something sit for more than a couple of minutes. It's mildly annoying. But at least I can pick up the threads pretty easily.

So! Okay. I still have to do blog work and re-code my web page for free stories and for-sale stories, plus Gods and Monsters and other blog work this evening. So, that's not so bad. And there's more mending and costuming and things in the next few days, but that seems not so bad for today. I guess the thing to remember, then, is to narrow down my input to one or two data streams at a time right now and just keep plugging away at everything I have to do. One by one, the penguins steal my sanity. Or something.

Adopt one today! Adopt one today! Adopt one today! Adopt one today! Adopt one today! Adopt one today! Adopt one today!
kittydesade: (randomity (nopejr))
Russian. Ulp. )

So, I keep looking at my to-do list up top and I have, out of all of those, struck ONE off the list. Because I declared it unfeasible. I really need to get back to actually, you know. Working on that. Plus the shitton of other things I have to do. Yeah, guess who didn't schedule herself just yet? (Guess who's going to do it as soon as she finishes her Russian corrections? Just the corrections, still too much crap to do today argh.)

I seem to still be embroiled in the middle of the Sampleocalypse at work. Which is to say I finished one sample skein of the fiber, and now I have to finish the sample scarf of the yarn and the sample cards of our brand of yarn because people of course picked last week to ask for them when we haven't had anyone asking after them in ages, which is good because we hadn't made up any. Because we're adding a new yarn and it'd be a pain in the ass to have a bunch, go through and add it all in and stick stickers on and SAMPLEOCALYPSE. But yes. That's happening. Slowly but surely. I'd like it more if more orders were happening, but c'est la vie.

I need to get off my ass and buy Scrivener, both because the coupon expires at the end of August and because, since no one seems interested in paying for/donating for Gods and Monsters (do I need to make that in bigger font or something? I was trying not to be obtrusive!) I'm thinking of tossing up a bunch of short stories for sale for 99 cents on my website. Not so much I'm trying to make an income here, I have a day job, but a supplemental income would be nice! And not to sound like I'm whining about G&M, because it's become very clear that that story was going to happen pretty definitely whether I wanted to or not. Might as well happen in a place where people can read it. I think what bugs me most, honestly, is that it's happening in a format in which I have NO feedback whatsoever. ... although now that I've gotten through the annoying introduction part and into the part where Shit Happens To People I'm finding that actually matters less. Huh. ANYWAY. So, yeah, that's happening. Or needs to happen. Lots of things need to happen. Can I just take the month of August off so shit can get done? No? No. Goddammit.

Right. Then let's get this show on the road, scheduling shit and whatnot. Incidentally, while my brain may be flying into a million pieces over all the shit I want to get done that I have to do, I am not, surprisingly, feeling poorly about myself. In any way, shape or form. I'm just frazzled, but I'm not down, if that makes sense. I think this makes for a nice change.

Adopt one today! Adopt one today! Adopt one today! Adopt one today! Adopt one today! Adopt one today! Adopt one today!
kittydesade: (do not thump the book of g'qon)
Russian! )

Arrrgh I'm having one of those No One Cares days again. ALREADY. I did not need this shit, I have work to do. Seeing "Oh look another episode of Night Vale" on my tumblr dash isn't helping, either. Bye bye, Tumblr. I can't be having with any of this shit today, no pity nor poking, I have work to do.

Okay, so. By the numbers then. Gods and Monsters went out today, I could do more work promoting it so I don't whine so much about how no one cares but I have other shit to do, so, later, maybe. I need to get two chapters of Gods and Monsters written this week so I'm not struggling to keep up after D*C. I need to code this week's chapter, that's pretty easy. I have How To Train Your Dragon tweet-along tonight, that should be good for getting at least the wig finished, maybe the Huntress costume to stitch back down and figure out if/how I can improve that white stripe towards the bottom. Ugh. And I should pin Faye Valentine, though pinning is probably all I'll get done during the movie. After that, for tasks to be fit in whenever I have time, hooks and eyes need to be bought and sewn at least to the Huntress cloak. I thought there was something else I needed to sew it to, but I can't remember now. And... no, there's more to do, but I just need to make sure it's on the list, not do it tonight. I need to make Huntress's belt, remake Silk Spectre and Cheetara's entire costume STILL, that's on the list for this weekend. Actually this weekend should be nothing but writing work and blog work and Cheetara/Silk Spectre.

WRITING WORK. Oh dear god. It's not even a list I have to keep other than in my head right now, it mostly consists of format and read over Black Ice, promo copy for Black Ice, set it up for publication. Kink Bingo and Gods and Monsters and Sandborn and blogwork but there is SO MUCH OF IT. It's actually a minor miracle I haven't gotten tired of either Black Ice or Gods and Monsters by now. I've hit the point of "oh god no one cares about this shit but me," but I haven't gotten tired of it yet. That's a good sign, right?

Head spinning. Too many damn things to do, not enough time. If I could take another week off of work maybe I could get everything done but, no, day job. Which means the next three weeks plus need to be scheduled extra efficiently and argh. Frustrated. Tired. Nowhere to go but to keep moving and fail better.
kittydesade: (fandom - tron)
Russian. )

No, Jag, you will at least do your corrections on your goddamn Russian before you pick up your knitting, your fanfic, or any other such thing. We work before we play.

(Though sometimes it's really tempting to do something else and put off Russian till the end of time.)

The fun thing is, knitting is my day job work today. Most of what can be done for the rest of it has been done, and we have a new yarn in that needs a sample done up of it, and since most of the knitters here are either not here or arthritic, I get to knit the sample! Yay!

Deep breaths, self. Yes, Dragon*Con is in a month or less. Yes, you haven't lost ALL the weight you wanted to. You know what? You lost most of it. And you toned the hell up. And your costumes are almost done. So deep breath, do your morning exercises like you've been doing, start knocking down those little mending and taking in and tailoring tasks one at a time. Keep moving. Keep an eye on your energy levels and keep getting a full night's sleep rather than panicking. You can do this.

Seriously, I've hit the point where my brain is running around shrieking about all the things I haven't done and my costume is going to suck and I'm not Batman Geek enough to be Huntress and what the hell am I even doing. This is unhelpful, brain. Especially when, yes, I do have a list of small costuming tasks I could be doing, and I can do them in pieces when I'm home. Shut the fuck up.

Weasels. Sweartogod.

I don't have anything else for you, I'm sorry. My life for the next month is going to be an endless cycle of routines, writing, and logistics for Dragon*Con. Minor logistics for scheduling and friends time and minor logistics for costumes. And gifts, for that matter. Hopefully there will be further updates as I have further successes. At least, I hope for successes! Still moderately freaking out about how I look in spandex. Fucksake, weasels, go away and leave me alone. I have work to do.

Adopt one today! Adopt one today! Adopt one today! Adopt one today!
kittydesade: (eh?)
Russian: Still with emergency conversations no one wants to have )

In the interests of maintaining routines, Russian, even though I still have a crapton of writing things to do. Even if it's only four lines. Argh. I still need to do corrections, too.

So, okay, the order of operations for this afternoon will be: 1/2 hour or so of RoundUp on the front walk because god knows I don't have time to do much weeding otherwise. Then poking around for dinner. Then sitting down in the office and mainlining through a big chunk of Person of Interest so that's out of the way, and then I may have more of Pope and Falling Skies. Because reasons. And we work before we play.

I did get at least the meta tags fixed on my web page and most of Gods and Monsters coded and up. I did not get the writing done that I wanted to because the internet crapped out on me for a couple of hours, but hey, at least some work got done? Enough to be going on with, at any rate. And I still feel better about my writing and my progress than I did last night, which is a major plus. I'd feel good enough to be going on with writing tonight if I didn't have a pile of blogwork to do. Which, that's okay, too. I need to get back into that analytical habit.

Adopt one today! Adopt one today! Adopt one today! Adopt one today!
kittydesade: (put some pants on)
Russian: still triggery )

DEFINITELY need to start copying that over to a notebook and starting a new list. I'd say I'll do that tonight but I already have a stupidly long list of things I want to do tonight.

But I did at least get most of my web page for Black Ice coded, bar the graphics. And, you know, the actual text. So it's coded but nowhere near finished yet, but at least it's coded and I know how it's going. And I'm surprisingly more comfortable with it than I thought I would be. Give it time, I'm sure I'll soon be convinced it sucks.

My friend April had a good idea I figured I'd run by alloy'all, once I get 'about' posts up on my blog for Sandborn and Black Ice so the tumblr posts have somewhere to link back to, what do you think of me trolling DeviantArt for art that I think is in the spirit of those works and tumblr'ing it with credit/linkback to the artists? Good promotional tool? Bad one? Yes/no/what the fuck Jag?

My mind is spinning around in circles. I think I'm doing a better job than I used to be capable of at corraling it and making it be productive, but still. Circles. I have so much that I want to get done and it feels like it all has to be done now and it's driving me bonkers. Exhibit A: this list of things that I want to do tonight. Bonkers, I tell you. Of course what's probably going to end up happening is all the writing stuff will be opened and all the other stuff will happen in between the writing stuff as I hit snarls in my brain for the writing. I'm sure that made English sense somewhere.

1. Spinning
2. Pick up in patio
3. Sew mended places in jeans (1/4)
4. Kink Bingo
5. Finish Pacific Rim fanfic
6. Gods and Monsters
7. Blog posts for soundtracks and other stuff
8. Pay bills
9. Edit Blood in the Gutters

On the plus side, we seem to have a new computer for the boy (whose laptop is dying a screaming painful death) so, at least I'll have my netbook and it won't get constantly stolen every time my back is turned. I have no idea what I'm doing about dinner, though. ARGH.

Adopt one today! Adopt one today! Adopt one today! Adopt one today! Adopt one today! Adopt one today!
kittydesade: (fragile heart)
Russian: Still about potentially traumatizing things )

At some point I'm just going to stick all that in a doc and start over again. That's getting really big almost to the point of being unwieldy.

So, today wasn't that bad at work! Despite the bizarre feeling like I just got out of vacation: No, I went to work Friday, I had a weekend, and now I'm back to work on a Monday like always. It's still weird, though.

There's stuff I keep meaning to talk about, as far as current writing projects go, and I keep running into the wall of don't say anything, be quiet, no one wants to hear it. You're not supposed to be loud. You're not supposed to advertise yourself. Except that makes no sense whatsoever, because how will people know what I'm working on, and how will they know to get excited and share it if I don't tell them? Also, fuck this not supposed to say anything good about myself or not be proud of myself shit. I don't know if this is an internalized misogyny thing or just a low self-esteem thing, but argh. It's frustrating.

Right. I suppose I have work to do, and sitting around trying to figure out what to blog about isn't going to get it done. Email first, and then more writing and things. And possibly spinning and shortbread as a reward when I'm done.

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